What did your mother say that made your jaw drop?

Do you know what she said mum?

Well the other day she came into my shop asking for the usual discount and mentioned that she had tickets for the wimbledon Tennis final but couldn’t go.

Well I slept with the president of the Lawn tennis Association year ago, I think he may have remembered!!

Why does my penis look like a mushroom when it gets big?

“Oh come off it mum what would be the point?”

So I said to my sister “ You mean to say that that you leave two empty seats rather than give them to your brother” I replied in astonishment. - “Well yes thats how it works in our circle!” responded my sister.

Oh I said, can my wife have them she would give her right arm to see a Wimbledon tennis final?

What are the most meaningful Jewish jokes that reveal insights about Jewish culture?

What do you mean son?

What! how could you do that?

About 30 years back, I was speaking with my mother.

Is the Donald Trump Bible any different from a regular Bible? Has Trump altered its contents?

What on earth has brought this on, said my mother?

Well she is so snotty, O.K. she may have married a bit of money, I don’t know but she feels she is above everybody else.

True - how I loved my mum!

Mark Hughes dissects how Verstappen's win bid imploded - The Race

Well son “ I think I might have got you some tickets”

She said, “Oh no I can’t give you our tickets, if we can’t go, well we don’t go - it is just not done to give away final tickets.”